AIS - The Cyre Job

Pierce's Plight XIII
The human story from a decidedly non-human source.

Cast of Characters

Jake Arrynt – Longtooth Shifter Warden: Silus Arrynt’s country nephew and heir apparent to Arrynt Inquisitive Services

Sam – Human Artificer: And his crossbow…Consultant for AIS...Hates the government and now works for them…

Guillermo Marquis de Todo (You better believe I copy/pasted that) – Water Genasi Warlord: Dabbler in Wizardry and the Common Language…

Crawgle – Kenku Rogue: Former Carney…Now King Crawgle the First…You had me at carney…

Pierce – Warforged Barbarian: Wonders what the human race could accomplish if they were not so busy eating, drinking, sleeping, and fucking…

Session 13 (Demise)

The bases of one of the Sharn towers is on fire…Distraction? We land as close to the tomb as we dare…Our pirate air captain thanks us and tells us to give him a call if we need help again…We are near the Taint Foundry…Not far to the tunnels…We don’t get far in when we run into a bunch of trained Drakes…One big Rage drake, four Spitters, and a bunch of Guard drakes…The fight goes well, they wear us down a little…We forge on…This time we reach the first tomb room with the pyramid of skulls…Looks like they animated a bunch of dead Kruthiks we were so good as to leave for them…Also in the mix are two Emerald Claw tanks and the elf with the goofy skull tattoo from when we first met Demise…This is a good long fight…In what has become standard practice, we just punch a hole through their lines, everyone but Sam surges after the back line…We then decide to try and use the area to our advantage…We take to the Kruthik tunnels and bypass most of the tomb…This actually works and we make it back to the large actual tomb in the back…We try to sneak up on them…No dice…The ritual is well underway, the large triple statue in the middle has a magic circle drawn around it…The hot librarian is stretched out on the sarcophagus in the back…Demise is on the far side of the ritual circle…There are four ghouls and half a dozen armored corpses…The bad guys beat most of our initiatives and form a defensive line…Jake sets off the ghouls readied actions and gets charged by three…They all miss…Jake decides to press on with his plan, provoking from all three…This time they all hit and he is immobilized…Crawgle tries to get around and pulls the last of the charges and gets pinned on the far side by a ghoul…Now that the way is safe, Pierce rolls in with a close burst 2 rage and gets two crits…He also discovers that the armored corpses are minions…The free attack from the crit drops the ghoul on Crawgle…Guii then steps up and Color Sprays to clear the minions and damage/daze the remaining ghouls…The librarian gets up and starts walking tward us thanking us for saving her (RED ALERT!!!)...Demise is launching necrotic attacks at us, but we have broken the front line…We all chase her around until she is dead…The librarian seems to be able to possess us and make us attack each other, or to hit us and make her invisible to that person…We just save her for the end…The ritual takes three days to perform so we just take all the crown pieces…We loot up and find Demise’s Staff of Ruin is a nice item, just not for this party…We head out…We find that we did bypass one welcoming party…We find in the devil room a pair of corpses with daggers in their backs…We suspect our double agent….

<somewhere>

- A stone rings in the field and a farmer picks it up-

<voice> You may have beat me this time, but it is not over…

<farmer> Wow, a talking rock…I gonna be rich!

<voice> You cannot fool me adventurers, I will get my revenge…

<farmer> You got a real purdy voice…

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Pierce's Plight XII
The human story from a decidedly non-human source.

Cast of Characters

Jake Arrynt – Longtooth Shifter Warden: Silus Arrynt’s country nephew and heir apparent to Arrynt Inquisitive Services

Sam – Human Artificer: And his crossbow…Consultant for AIS...Hates the government and now works for them…

Guillermo Marquis de Todo (You better believe I copy/pasted that) – Water Genasi Warlord: Dabbler in Wizardry and the Common Language…

Crawgle – Kenku Rogue: Former Carney…Now King Crawgle the First…You had me at carney…

Pierce – Warforged Barbarian: Wonders what the human race could accomplish if they were not so busy eating, drinking, sleeping, and fucking…

Session 12 (Betrayal)

Our undercover contact tells us they have the last piece of the crown and are on their way up…We ask about where Bossy is…She is always the one to call us on the rock…He said she is there but busy…We are suspicious…Suddenly, Jake and Guii notice that a group of heavily armed and armored gnolls push through the crowd on the far side of the market…They are in formation to cover that damn undead wanna be elf with the clever name…She has two incorporeal wraiths floating along with her…We don’t bother talking…Jake gets a curse from her and a blast of necrotic energy…The scale/shield gnolls wielding triple flails move in on Jake…The wraiths disappear…We start hammering the gnoll front line…The gnolls prove enough of a distraction that the wraiths both jump Crawgle, who had been using the tent to whip daggers from cover…We punch a hole through the front line…Guii leads the charge into the funerary mask wearing leader…Guii hits hard…PIERCE follows him for a very messy finishing move…He ping pongs with a charge back and crits the last gnoll…He finishes his turn with a head butt into a bystander…He misses but howls loudly anyway…Guii starts back to focus on the wraiths, dragging the dead elf by the hair…No one is taking his loot…Pierce’s knowledge banks actually get a hit on these undead…He remembers that they are called Filcher Wraiths…Crap…One goes down quickly with some Sam love…The other disappears…We attempt to find the thing…Crawgle realises that the gem part of the crown is missing…fook…We spread out and attempt to find the wraith…A crowd is beginning to form…Nothing attracts a crowd like a fight…The Wordbearers crawl back up the shaft under the third tent while we search for the wraith…Suddenly, one of us notices that they are not just beat up, but dead…Or rather undead…Bossy has an aura of necrotic energy floating around her…It is back on, unhealed without a short rest…PIERCE strikes with a loud blast from his horn…None of them are minions…Dailies are unloaded, action points spent…lucky for us they are concentrated, Jake can mark the house, Sam drops magic weapon on nearly all of us, and for a change, Guii can Fireblast without lighting Jake on fire…Heck, Crawgle even forces his way to the back…Bossy lashes out with blasts of necrotic energy everytime she is targeted…A good fight, but the formation favors us…Unfortunately, it is a good fight…The market is getting crazy crowded…The crowd is beginning to attract a crowd…The fight ends, and we see flags entering the market of the city’s police/skullcrackers…No freaking way we are going to jail in monster land…We assess the situation…Pierce loots the leader, who has reverted to the form of a changeling…Crap, another deception…He gains a platinum necklace, bag of gold, and Healing potions…Sam looks at the crowd…Who are looking right back at him…Thinking quickly, he walks up to a burly hobgoblin and dumps 10 gp into his hands…”Go cause a distraction”...The hobgoblin grins and walks over to this huge minotaur in the audience and punches him in the jimmy…A goddamn riot starts…We all chuckle…Guii loots Bossy, finding a diary, a bastard sword with an enchantment that cannot go on heavy blades, and gold…Crawgle loots the second in command and finds some nice +2 leather armor…Of course he just bought +1 leather in the market a few hours ago…At this point the crowd is nuts, a giant if using a gnoll as a club, dogs and cats are sleeping together, someone is sticking their dick in the lemoncakes, and we see riot police at all the exits from the market square…Pierce suggests we jump down the hole but everyone reminds him that they are warded so that only goblins can enter…Guii suggests the rooftops…Pierce and Jake both try to force their way through the crowd, no dice…Krawgle finesses his way through, NP…He enters the nearest shop…Guii is able to force his way, but is unable to help our least physically gifted member, Sam, through with him…The crowd is so large that the air is getting thick and heavy…This is looking very bad…Suddenly the goblin air ship drops down above the market and lowers ropes for us…We thank the captain and high tale it out of there…He points to some flying shapes headed toward the market…The ruler of the city set his shocktroops on the riot that Sam started, Harpies…

The Captain of the airship informs us that he was at House Lyrandar and someone had purchased a teleport to Sharn right before he heard the ruckus and headed to save us…Suddenly, the sending stone chirps…It is the supposed double agent (triple agent, double-double agent?) from the goblin tribe…He has called to taunt us, tell us he is headed to Sharn, that we will bring him the crown, that he will tell the Sharn CIA that we are the traitors and that we are fucked…We seriously consider just chucking the damn rock over the side…Some insults are tossed the other way…The captain agrees to take us to Sharn…It will take about a day…Sam moves an enchantment from a spear we found to a sword for Guii and an enchantment from some Platemail onto Jake’s Hide Armor…Pierce tries on Jake’s old armor…It smells of burrowing animals…Then everyone grabs some grub and shut eye…Pierce only needs four hours and is up and rested…He decides to walk the deck and take in the sights…Wondering if he is doomed to never see Air Pirate/Ninjas…”Be careful what you wish for”, he thinks as a huge Blue Dragon lands on the forecastle and demands tribute…”Shit”, is about all Pierce gets a chance to say before the Captain slams the Airship in to a steep dive…The dragon roars and sinks it’s claws into the deck….Pierce starts free falling a few feet above the deck…He slams his spear into the deck so as not to get swept right off the side…Everyone in the sleeping cabin is tossed into the air and slammed into the back wall when the Captain pulls us out of the steep decent…The dive has made our airship go ridiculously fast…PIERCE pulls his spear out of the deck and chargers with a hoot and a howl…Everyone piles out of the sleeping cabin and lays into the dragon…PIERCE rages, Jake bleeds and becomes a were-badger, Guii puts a giant bullseye on the dragon making it almost unmissable (and looking suspiciously like a boot pattern)...The dragon is quickly slowed, immobilized, and dazed….He launches lighting at us six different ways and hits PIERCE with the frightful dread…We drop this unlikely sky pirate much to the Captains delight that he gives Pierce his set of magic Hide armor…We mount the dragons skull on the bow…Guii cuts out some leather for boots…blue boots…Freaking Genasi…The cookie frys up dragon steaks for dinner…We fly on to Sharn and the mess that awaits us there…

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Pierce's Plight XI
The human story from a decidedly non-human source.

Cast of Characters

Jake Arrynt – Longtooth Shifter Warden: Silus Arrynt’s country nephew and heir apparent to Arrynt Inquisitive Services

Sam – Human Artificer: And his crossbow…Consultant for AIS...Hates the government and now works for them…

Guillermo Marquis de Todo (You better believe I copy/pasted that) – Water Genasi Warlord: Dabbler in Wizardry and the Common Language…

Crawgle – Kenku Rogue: Former Carney…Now King Crawgle the First…You had me at carney…

Pierce – Warforged Barbarian: Wonders what the human race could accomplish if they were not so busy eating, drinking, sleeping, and fucking…

Session 11 (Setting the Snare)

We meet back up with Bossy goblin and introduce her to the lost tribes…She promises them relief…Then we head back to the surface…We find someone has prepaired a welcoming committee for us…The defeated group of BladeBearer Hobgoblins have been animated and are waiting for us…Zombie fight, Woot!...Some fall easily…The former leader seems to be a higher form of zombie and draws alot of fire…We clear them out…Bossy invites us to travel in her wreck of an airship to a major city in the monster ruled land...We repair the ship and head out…

STILL NO AIR PIRATE/NINJA ATTACKS…suck

We land…Bossy tells us we will get eaten if we spend much time outside the “safe” area…We head to the safe area to sell our loot and resupply…Bossy searches the city and determines that the location of the next piece is under the biggest market in area…We need to dig under it without attracting notice…Guii’s tents come in handy…Canvas is apparently worth it’s weight in gold around here…We open a healing tent, a massage parlor, and a third tent that the goblins can Excavate in…Sam spends his time trying to learn a new ritual…We end up being not so good at it…I personally massage two people into our hospital tent…Crawgle does juggling tricks…Guii distracts the curious…Jake insults everyone that can speak goblin…I think he only knows the swear words…Eventually the “law” shows up and demands to see our papers…We retort by stabbing them to death….We throw the corpses down the hole the goblins have opened up…During the disposal we notice that they have no badges and may have just been trying to shake us down…Oops…The goblins head down the hole to get the last piece of the crown…We delay some more…We learn that troll steaks are a the local delicacy and that asking Pierce for a manual release after your massage is not a good move…Finally the rock phone rings…Our contact babbles something about how everything has gone bad and they are all going to die…Bossy needs a rescue…

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Pierce's Plight X
The human story from a decidedly non-human source.

Cast of Characters

Jake Arrynt – Longtooth Shifter Warden: Silus Arrynt’s country nephew and heir apparent to Arrynt Inquisitive Services

Sam – Human Artificer: And his crossbow…Consultant for AIS...Hates the government and now works for them…

Guillermo Marquis de Todo (You better believe I copy/pasted that) – Water Genasi Warlord: Dabbler in Wizardry and the Common Language…

Crawgle – Kenku Rogue: Former Carney…Now King Crawgle the First…You had me at carney…

Pierce – Warforged Barbarian: Wonders what the human race could accomplish if they were not so busy eating, drinking, sleeping, and fucking…

Session 10 (Tentacle Love)

We wake up in our barred room the next morning…We head out…After some digging we find ourselves in a HUGE room with a river running through it…Several of us notice a bunch of corprial pale goblins with stone weapons hiding on the other side and up a cliff…Jake first insults their mothers…Then he called them dishonorable…Then said they were aberration lovers…He is the only one to speak goblin, but we can see it is not going well…Pierce gives them the ole goblin fist thump salute…This calms them down, they invite us over and inform us they are still battling the aberrations all these generations since it ended on the surface…They are very happy to find out they have won the war…We dance around the fact that the continent is now infested with other humanoid races and play up the fact that we are recovering the crown to aid the assention of the rightful family of goblins…They inform us that behind their camp is a collapsed tunnel that aberrations pour out of every so often…Sounds good to us…I (we) dig on through…We find a motley collection of aberrations scattered down two elevation changes…A tentacled leader is doing some mischief at the pool…We try to draw them to the highest portion to fight, but Crawgle wants to mix it up, and since he moved first he ends up at the front getting beat up…We start unloading, they have ranged spike shooters…We have Guii blowing bitches up…PIERCE gets mad and starts pushing four armed dudes off of cliffs…A good long fight ending with lots of stabbing of backline spike shooters…We loot up and find our next crown piece…It is a stone that does bad things to stuff you critically wound…We give it to Crawgle…

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Pierce's Plight IX
The human story from a decidedly non-human source.

Cast of Characters

Jake Arrynt – Longtooth Shifter Warden: Silus Arrynt’s country nephew and heir apparent to Arrynt Inquisitive Services

Sam – Human Artificer: And his crossbow…Consultant for AIS...Hates the government and now works for them…

Guillermo Marquis de Todo (You better believe I copy/pasted that) – Water Genasi Warlord: Dabbler in Wizardry and the Common Language…

Crawgle – Kenku Rogue: Former Carney…Now King Crawgle the First…You had me at carney…

Pierce – Warforged Barbarian: Wonders what the human race could accomplish if they were not so busy eating, drinking, sleeping, and fucking…

Session 9 (Scared of the Dark)

God damn it…Everyone thinks I am a fucking steamshovel…”Our” agreement apparently included our doing all the fooking digging…Jake the badger boy and I spent hours digging through until we hit the chamber the goblin leader thinks is our path…It is a large tomb with a squat six sided obelisk in the middle…The communal burial monuments are broken and looted…We are told that we are splitting up at this point…The goblin races can use the obelisk to teleport near the furthest crown piece and we are hoofing it…Sam notices that the obelisk is leaking necrotic energy, so we get behind the doors before the goblins leave…This is a good move because a blast of necrotic energy animates all the bones in the room…We start in a good defensive position in the hall, there is a strange patch of ashen dust that we avoid, but we hack and pound the undead back into tomb detritus…We turn around, take a step and notice two wraith like forms in the room behind us…There are more patches of the dusty stuff…Jake charges in and engages both of them taking care not to step on the darker areas…..The room is damaged on two sides with 20’ drop offs into other room…The wraiths blast out necrotic energy and drag Jake onto one of the patches…Poof! they pop into large necrotic dust clouds…It is a small area so we are able to keep striking the insubstantial creatures until the disencorporate…We have two ways to go…we choose the larger cliff face and notice another form down below…Looks like another one of those shadow wraiths…We start the fight, it joins us on top of the cliff, but he is alone and falls quickly…His chamber has nothing of value and two exits that are blocked by rubble…We poke around in them and decide they are very blocked…We climb back up and descend the other side…More digging…We see light ahead… and a little glowing transparent goblin…He sees us and darts away…We shrug and continue…We climb the cliff face to the lit area…we find many translucent stalagmites with goblins frozen in them…We move to explore this room when the residents attack…A bunch of the little glowy goblins, two tentacled humanoid aberrations…It is a two front fight and a tough one, but we eventually cut them all down…The glow is some strange pools of water…Sam and Guii inform us that some sort of magic from the far planes locked the goblins in the stalagmites…At that point the rock phone rings and the bossy goblin tells us to be careful not to release the aberrant hordes locked behind the seals…She also tells us that this area became a battle ground during the old goblin wars…Okay we tell her…We pick the right most hall and start digging again…We pop out into a room with a bunch of ghostly goblins fighting a bunch of four armed, two mouthed messes we fought in the Keep we found Silus in all those years ago…Jake moves in to engages a mess, one of the goblins takes a swing at him…It is then on…We kill everything…Guii has an AOE-gasme…We loot up…The hall forks into two collapsed areas…We dig right and run into odd deep speech runes made of glowing purple rock, like what Crawgle’s crown is made of…We decide this must be the seals…We dig the other way…And by We, I mean Badger boy and I…The rest of the party buffs their fingernails to a nice shine…Maybe the can blind the next glowing tentacled slime we run into…It takes us into a large room…We climb a cliff on the far side of it…There are bad guys waitin on us…A few soldier type abberations move to us, and a large abberation stays in the back…We start hacking, burning, and pokin our way through them…The large guy picks up Jake and chucks him into Sam…Unfortunately that was his one trick, he must have been eating something with butter on it…He missed grabbing Jake twice before sending him flying…A tentacled baddy joins from an adjoining room, but it is too late and we wipe the floor with him…The tentacle thing came from an room with three exits, all sealed with doors that can be barred from the inside…We decide to explore some more…Through one of the doors is a vast space, there is some sort of fungus growing here that burns very easy, not explosively, but like a well laid campfire…We avoid it and a transparent goblin steps from around the corner, and with a sad look on it’s face, waves us into the chamber…Bad move…Burning corpses jump us…Goblin boy jumps into Jakes head and makes him set off a flame jet in the room, and a flaming bat swoops in…There is much burning..Much missing..and more burning, but we make it…we loot everyhing determine the exits are all warded against the horde…We head back, bar the doors and crash for the night…

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Pierce's Plight VIII
The human story from a decidedly non-human source.

Cast of Characters:

Jake Arrynt – Longtooth Shifter Warden: Silus Arrynt’s country nephew and heir apparent to Arrynt Inquisitive Services

Sam – Human Artificer: And his crossbow…Consultant for AIS…Hates the government and now works for them…

Guillermo Marquis de Todo – Water Genasi Warlord: Dabbler in Wizardry and the Common Language…

Crawgle – Kenku Rogue: Former Carney…Now King Crawgle the First…You had me at carney.

Pierce – Warforged Barbarian – Wonders what the human race could accomplish if they were not

so busy eating, drinking, sleeping, and fucking…

Intern Guy – Human Psion: Just wanted a little extra credit…

Session 8 (Malfunction)

Malfunction…Malfunction…Malfunction…Initiating Safe Mode…

Part of me is caught between my PIERCE program and Pierce program…I float beside my worldly-form, and observer…It makes a long walk much easier…We continue our march, each night, I hope my shut down will restore me to full control, but so far, that hope is in vain…Our group was jumped by an Emerald Claw ambush team on the road to Six Kings…I continue the journey leaving my friends to fight…The catch up to me, maybe that group was after Crawgle’s crown…We continue our march and very near the tombs we caught up with the goblin group by the third king…Another fight I remain motionless through…I get a good view of these warriors…They fight hard…

We arrive at Six Kings that day and meet with the word keepers…Since they were not creative enough to come up with a good lie, we told them the truth, just leaving out the bit about how we’re working for the CIA…Our agent suggests trial by combat…This is a brief ritual contest in which we demonstrated in single combat, that we’re competent to help them…We agree on the terms…We get the loot, we get the use of the crown parts, and they get our help…Then we camped for the night…This downtime finally restores me to normal operation…

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Pierce's Plight VII
The human story from a decidedly non-human source.

Cast of Characters

Jake Arrynt – Longtooth Shifter Warden: Silus Arrynt’s country nephew and heir apparent to Arrynt Inquisitive Services

Sam – Human Artificer: And his crossbow…Consultant for AIS...Hates the government and now works for them…

Guillermo Marquis de Todo (You better believe I copy/pasted that) – Water Genasi Warlord: Dabbler in Wizardry and the Common Language…

Crawgle – Kenku Rogue: Former Carney…Now King Crawgle the First…You had me at carney…

Pierce – Warforged Barbarian: Wonders what the human race could accomplish if they were not so busy eating, drinking, sleeping, and fucking…

Session 7 (Skullduggery)

Back to the office to rest up before we board the Airship in the morning…Knock at the door and our intern arrives with a note..Jake reads it and tells us that the elves we met earlier are not who she thought they were…The elves we met earlier are ruled by undead elves that entered undeath through a ritual involving positive energy…Only the best of their race achieve this honor…Apparently, the elves we met are from a faction that believes every elf should be able to become undead, even through necromancy…The original crown had some powerful uses vs undead…She was so worried about them that she stashed copies of her notes in her guest suite at the University…Crap, we all assume she is dead or missing…We rush out into the rain and locate her bungalow…The door is cracked…We open it and and hear some noise from the a office room near the back…We head in and suddenly the elf from earlier with the half mask appears, spouting threats…Most of the party see through this projected illusion to the undead creature it hides…They attack…Several zombies, some ghouls, and a wight…They all are covered with the traditional tattoos of the elven lands that worship/ are lead by the undead…Several area attacks tell us that there is not a minion among them…Our new intern sat outside watching…He has a strange facial tick when fighting is going on near by…He really twitches right before the bad guys start attacking each other…We get to work and chop them down one by one…They have no loot, no information, a big fat zero…It looks like they were straightening the place up to hide the evidence of the abduction…Jake gets her notes…We leave…Next morning we notice a buzz on the street about the dead elves in the University…Oops, we might have wanted to tell someone about that…Good thing we have to meet with our contact in the Sharn Government before we leave…We tell him everything…He does not seem surprised at all…He tells us that undead attacked the Good Goblins last night and they took some losses…Guii collects his pile of stuff…We head out and board the ship…

No Air Pirates attack damn it…

We land without incident and find that the road we are to follow is a piece of shit…We also learn that we are on the border with a real peach of a country ...They are ruled by three hags…Have a lot of bad guys all trying to out bad each other…There is a particularly spicy minotaur bad ass in a keep not far from Six Kings...We head out…It is a long hard hike that is actually also a skill challenge…lots of endurance checks and creative uses of our skills lead us to a group of human scouts of the Emerald Claw and a goblin prisoner…Emerald Claw attacked us outside of where we saved Silus Arrynt just before Cyre went boom…They don’t want to talk/We don’t want to talk and arrows fly…We are at the bottom of a ravine with three of them and the goblin…There are also two up above…Intern Guy starts twitching and the guys up above us start punching and slapping each other…Everyone else charges in to beat on the guys on our level…Guii fireblasts Jake, this has become down right normal by now…Everyone moves around and seems to dare the archers to melee with them provoking plenty of OA…The two stooges continue to pound each other up above…We drop the lower scouts and save the goblin…Then everyone climbs the embankment like goats and knock the crap out of the two up above…We forget to spare anyone in our blood lust…We cut the goblin free…We try and play dumb about goblins and ask him a bunch of questions…He tells us he is from the truthseekers faction and is on a mission headed back the way we came…I drop the fact that we are on our way to Six Kings to loot the tombs in order to finish building a crown…I did this in hopes someone in the party would get a good insight check on him…Guess what? None of us has an insight worth a shit…We probably get ripped off on all our taxi rides…The goblin hurries off, we had hoped he would provide us an in when we get to Six Kings…Oh well…

Our hike continues, more endurance, heal, athletics, perception, and nature checks…A few days later we are near the mino keep…A few of us notice a Gnoll up on top of these small buttes…Maybe 20 feet tall only 20 feet wide for the most part and very steep sided…Seeing no real way to sneak up on these guys we approach…Closer to the lookout we are able to see around the bend in the path and notice another two goblins and a minotaur around a stew pot…There is a human head on the ground next to it…They attack…we fight back…Two orcs hiding in the woods join in…They don’t make it…We find some solid loot and head on…More skill checks await us…

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Pierce's Plight VI
The human story from a decidedly non-human source.

Session 6 (What do you mean “they cut the power”?)

Battered and bruised we woke in the morning to find Jake his old self…We decided to give the only remaining healing potion to Jake as a welcome back gesture…We left the Tomb and a short distance down the corridor found ourselves blocked by the ass end of a devil statue…We took stock of the direction and distance of the dungeon we had explored so far and decided this was the reverse of a room we were in previously…Unable to find a way around the devil’s caboose we back tracked…Next room back was the tomb with the blood fountain…No unexplored options…Next room back is the sewer room…I boosted Jake up and he found a small tunnel (squeezing for a small creature) that the flying Kruthik had jumped us from…Pierce game Guii the “I told you so look” and pulled the grate from the floor…It emptied into a room about 10 feet down…We lowered a rope and climbed down…We found a medium sized tunnel the Kruthik had dug…Single file we headed down…Too not become lost we went left at every intersection…We found paths to other rooms we had been too…We then found a new crossroads room with two high ceiling braces and a bunch of rubble…

Several party members pointed out that there was a slime that normally suggest a Kruthik egg chamber near by…We stepped into the room and found we had not seen several Kruthik hidding in the room…Jake earned this spot by getting most of the attacks dropped on him…Things actually went well, we fought a new type of Kruthik that spits poison spikes, but they had a case of the misses and did not recharge…We headed down the slimiest tunnel out…Finally we found a large deadended room full of eggs and slime curtains…It was at this point that several nature studying members of the party informed the rest of us that there is no such thing as a Kruthik Queen…Any Kruthik female can lay eggs…But there is a Hive Lord that does the male side of things…We headed into the room…We were beset by every Kruthik in the book, including some swarms and a Hive Guardian…He appeared to want to direct things from the back and spit a large blast of acid when things were clear…Guii fireblasted Jake and all the buggy friends surrounding him…Pierce bypassed the main fight and went to stab the Guardian…Crawgle went for the flank and started dicing…Robbie missed with his Scouring Bolt for the second straight encounter….Things went well and we found a +2 Amulet of Protection…We gathered 31 eggs, discovering that about 1 in 5 have the flying mutation…We collected our fee from an ungrateful Tainte Factory foreman…Then the Hobgoblin Priest wet himself when he found out we had found an old goblin tomb…He hustled off to explore it himself and told us that we should talk to some hot elven professor at the University…We headed to the Zoology department head and collected our interns and payment…Guii tried very very hard to squeeze some more loot out of him, but he had nothing…We then headed off for a meeting with the hot half-elven professor…She met outside, told us how we rule, and then asked us if she could borrow the blade for a few days…We declined her offer, informing her that the only thing that would accomplish would be her death or it getting stolen…

She informed us that we had a piece of a crown...It has five pieces…Each piece resides in the tomb of one of the five great goblin warlords…The crown originally was a four piece crown from the elven nation the goblins drove from the continent ages ago…The piece Crawgle uses to kill people is a goblin addition to the crown…She also informed us that she knows the ritual by which the crown could be reformed…We headed back to the Offices and waited around…Unfortunately we received a Summons from the chief of security for Sharn…These were the same spooks that left Arrynt out to dry on his last mission into Cyre…A more unenthusiastic group you could not find…There was no way around the summons other than leaving Sharn and not returning…We reported to the giant ominous building where a gnome played St. Peter and sent us in to see a large scared human that claimed to be head of security…Of course he knew everything and told us that we could do our country a great service if we helped meddled in another countries power struggles…The Goblin Nation had three contenders for unification…Whichever tribe assembled our crown would be defacto ruler…Sharn wants the most civilized tribe to win…We are to go by airship to a set of goblin tombs know as the Six Kings and ingrate ourselves into the favored tribe, helping them find the pieces…There is suppose to be an agent in that tribe already but they cannot help us overtly…He promises that this will earn us the favor of the government and the lucrative contracts would return to Arrynt’s heirs…Not a single person wants to do this because they fooked Arrynt and left him to die…But we find we have no real choice…We swear an oath not to reveal what we learned and Guii requisitions most of the items in the PH for the journey…We then head back to the University hoping for a good cover story from the hot librarian…We find her in the tea room with some unusual fullblooded elves with a serious goth/death metal fetishist for a tailor…They wear skull makeup and have funerary items about their persons…

Apparently everyone and their mother’s know we have the piece of the crown…We should expect the goblin ninjas through the windows every night…These elfs want to see the piece of the crown…we allow it and they confirm that it is authentic…They offer to buy it for three times it’s worth…If only we could sell it…They have undead rulers that may actually be the rightful owners of the crown, but we are stuck helping the Sharn CIA mess with the goblin nations…So we lie to them and they leave politely…Great, add elven ninjas to the que for the windows…The professor really has not found much out…We invite her with us to go to the Six Kings…Pierce attempts to bluff by saying that with six tombs to loot our chances are pretty good there…She sees right through him and badgers us in goblin for more information…We lie and just try and get her on the ship…I think Sam might like her…Show her your crossbow Sam…I hear the ladies love that…We head off for the airship, we hope that will throw the ninjas off our tracks…

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Pierce's Plight V
The human story from a decidedly non-human source.

Session 5 (THE HORROR…the horror…)

The sewage room proved to be too much for Jake…He went near catatonic…The only thing he could seem to do was give Guii his healing potion and translate goblin for us…We decided to press on…The next room we discovered had a large hand with a bubbling blood fountain in it…One wall had two large alcoves with stone sarcophagus in them…The floor around them was littered with blackened bones…Four other doors were in the room…Three were steel and had the words “Sworn Brothers” written on them in Goblin…The last was stone…The blood fountain had an inscription on it in goblin that stated that sworn brothers and great warriors drank blood to bind themselves to each other…Guii confirmed that this was common practice among some cultures including goblin tribes…Pierce felt around the bottom of the fountain and found an inlet of some sort and decided to drink some blood…Nothing seemed to happen…Everyone else decided to try it too…We even forced some down Jake’s gullet…The fountain had motes of energy floation around it, but these seemed benign…Pierce checked the stone sarcophagus and found the bones were blackened not by heat but by necrotic energy…The coffins seemed solid and had latches/hinges to open them, but there seemed to be some sort of pressure on them from inside…These seemed like the wrong course so we spread out around the room…Pierce and Crawgle decided that maybe since we drank the blood we were now sworn brothers and went to one of the steel doors…It was locked, so Crawgle picked it open with Pierces tools….Boom, wrong move…Several things happened at once…All three steel doors flew open…The door nearest Sam appeared empty…The door no one was by had a quick moving Hobgoblin corpse in it…Crawgle and Pierce’s door had a skeleton in hobgoblin armor in it armed with a big ass falchon….The sarcophagus blew open with a burst of necrotic energy (lucky no one was near it) and five skeletons formed from the piles…Lastly the fountain in the middle of the room began to produce a red misty fog…

The hobgoblin corpse was a wight and sprang to flank with the falchon wielding skeleton to beat on Crawgle, sucking out healing surges with each hit…Pierce suffered an OA in order to shout kill three of the blackened minions then recharge the falchon wielding skeleton…Sam’s empty room proved to hold a ghost like figure that chased him around the room…The fountains mist continued to grow but we quickly determind that it did not seem to hurt us…Much healing, a 1 on the avalanche strike, and a game of “chase the invisible ghost”...We were victorious with Pierce unconscious and everyone else well worn…We found no loot, healed up, and considered taking a rest in the room…We quickly changed our minds when the noise of the Kruthiks because louder…We pressed on…20 feet past the stone door we found another room…This one was freaking huge…About 125 feet long by 60 feet wide…The room was lit by those motes of energy…In the center of the room was a huge statue with four saluting hobgoblins back to back facing all directions…In the near corners of the room were statues of spike chain armed guards…Big columns lined the room to the far side…The far side has two statues of hobgoblins with scimitars, two stone chests and a stone sarcophagus with a lifesized carving of a reclining hobgoblin warrior with large tusks…This looks like the main tomb we have been looking for…No Kruthik tunnels in this room…One other door on the far side of the room…Krawgle and I saluted the giant statues in the middle of the room, it seemed only polite…I moved to check out one of the nearer statues and Krawgle the other…Everyone else hung by the entrance…The did not appear actuated and the spiked chains looked to be stone…We left the eyes alone for now and moved to the large central statues…We discovered that the base of the statue looked like it could rotate…Crawgle and Pierced jambed it so it could not move…The rest of the party filtered into the center of the room…We moved up to the back wall…I was near one scimitar statue, again looking just like a statue…Crawgle was near the other on the opposite side of the dias…Sam was near the center with Guii…Near the boxes and the main coffin…The reclining statue appeared to be female…

Pierce checked to see if the scimitar wielding hobgoblin statue would move at all by gently rocking and twisting it…That set off the fireworks…The four central statues boomed out a warning that the honorable amongst us should have guided the dishonourable out of the tomb…It then tried to do something that Crawgle and Pierce had prevented it from doing…The five statues in the corners and on the coffin came to life…The had suprise and beat the shit out of us…Won initiative and beat more shit out of us…The hit hard and drained surges…When our initiatives came around it was on…We decided we had to retreat to the far side where we had a doorway to defend about 25 squares away…Anyone with a Daily smoked one…Potions were drunk…Another 1 was rolled on an Avalance strike…We were able to pull back into that hallway very beat up and without any more healing from Sam or Guii left and half the party bloodied…More potions were drunk…Crawgle had the worst run of die luck I have ever seen…He had around 7 rolls in a row under 5 to 7…Unless it was a Stealth check which he was hitting in spades…Crits were rolled…Pierce went down like a pile of spare parts, but we made it with around three surges left in the party…We looted and found a blue glowing +2 named magic sword that switched forms between longsword, dagger, and a few other shapes…It was also much stronger vs Aberations…Unfortunately, Kruthiks are not aberrations…Crawgle was awarded this weapon, at which point we realised the magic weapon he is using now gives him a cumulative +1 to hit each time he misses, oops…This weapon is also famed among the goblin tribes, which might help us later…We also found some good cash loot…We decided to rest and hope to the gods that Jake snaps out of it…

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Pierce's Plight IV
The human story from a decidedly non-human source.

Session 4 (Just Another Bug Hunt?)

We head into the tunnel…Crawgle felt better, but kept muttering that he ate rat all the time and this never happened before…We came across the remains of an not so old fight, the room still reeked of ammonia (the Kruthik death scent)...We found black fletched arrows that goblins commonly use…We brushed this off as there was a hobgoblin was one of the ones that hired us, this could have been one of the other sets of exterminators sent in by their followers…A little deeper we found a finished room with a sepulchre in the middle with piles of humanoid skulls, a red banner, a caved in wall, a stone door, and several dug tunnels that we assumed the Kruthik dug…We did not get long to search before a clanking sound preceded a swarm of Kruthik showing up…Pierce and Jake plugged two of the holes…This held them off for a round until they started cutting their own routes into the room…Jake was able to finish his lightly infested tunnel and draw the loose Kruthik to him…For no front line in a tight area this fight was very cleanly fought…Things just went our way…We found discovered this room was the entry area to a very old goblin shrine…Jake found a sack of belongings in the skull pile…Looks like goblins tried to get into this famous goblin’s tomb and recover some famous blade...Sam tells us that the banner is magical and Guii grabs it…We take their clues and head through the stone doors because the Kruthik tunnels seem like a bad idea…Next room has a 5×5 set of named tiles in the center…We play with them a little while with no luck…We eventually step on a tile with the goblin word “flame”...Poof, three fire elementals show up…We begin to fight them…They trigger the tile with the goblin word for “hell”...Poof an imp appears…We keep fighting, they keep pressing tiles…Lucky for us, only minions show up after the first sets…After we beat the summoned monsters, the tiles crack, destroying our way into the tomb…fook…On to the next room….Twenty foot stair down to a 4×4 room with more symbols in the center 2×2 area…Jake discovers a pit in the first untiled square with a grinder at the bottom…Pierce jumped across the whole room (showing off) and climbed the far 20’ stair up to a door…He pushed on it to see if it was trapped…It was…

Very little was not trapped when it was triggered…Both doors locked, both staircases became slides, the tiled center squares with the words began to rock back and forth, and the outer ring of space around the tiles became pits to the grinder or had stabbing rods from the ceiling…Lucky for Pierce, everyone was able to stay where they were and not fall in or get stabbed by one of the traps…Shortly their after that the Kruthiks showed up from tunnels in the pits but just above the grinder…Guii blew them all away with one sniper fireball…Pierce began to disable the three hinges on his door, Crawgle reset the stairs, and the rest of the party made their ways across the playground of doom…We made it out without major injuries but with much shit given to Pierce…Down and over a few passages led us to another door…Inside we found an odd room…The sewer poured from the center of the room into a floor grate…Four statues of skeletal displacer beasts surrounded the torrent of sewage…Around the room were niches that had bones in them…Several party members noticed movement in the alcoves and three figures standing in the water stream between the statues….Two dead drakes and a rotten, bloated humanoid…We moved in and struck hard and fast…Guii flamebursts and critted a zombie lizard, Crawgle threw daggers and critted the other zombie reptile, and then Jake, Pierce, and Sam blew away the corruption corpse and the minions…A fight where luck fell all over our party…We searched the room and looked for ways out of the room…Guii gave Pierce a massive stinkeye when he suggested exploring up or down the sewage grate…

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